15 Jun 2016
I am currently majoring in computer science in a concentration in scientific applications. I did study mathematics and physics previously. I plan to double major in both computer science and mathematics as I have interests in mathematics and I feel that computer science is useful in this day and age. I have a GPA of 3.71 and I hope to raise it in the next couple years. I’m not exactly sure what to do after I graduate, I have a lot to discover in the world of computer science since I have newly entered it. I just hope to graduate without the brain injury becoming a hindrance.
I had sustained a traumatic brain injury on the 25th of September of last year. I remained to be in a coma for almost a month. Apparently, I was heading to work on a rainy day down a hill, my car hydroplaned, I lost control, and ended up being T-boned. Fortunately, no one else was harmed in the accident. I entered the hospital in stable condition, but about a week later, my lungs shut down and my chance to live was 11%. My sister was there with me in Chattanooga, TN along with a great friend of mine that flew down to see me; my dad worked in Huntsville, AL and my mom was in South Korea since her father died on the same day as my accident. The doctors even told my dad that he would not make it in time to see me alive and he was only a 2-hour drive away. I was hooked up with an Extracorporeal Membrane Oxygenation (ECMO) machine where my blood was being pumped out of my body, infused with oxygen, and put back in again – this moved my chance of living to 25%. My twin sister didn’t even know what she would do without me living, we are so close. In the accident, I also broke a clavicle clean through, lost a tooth, and sustained a bone bruise in my left knee among other things. After my stay in Erlanger Hospital in Chattanooga, I was transferred to rehabilitation hospital Shepherd Center in Atlanta, GA.
When I woke up, my family claims I couldn’t even recognize them, that I would just look in the direction of a noise. I don’t remember what it was like in the beginning, I forgot most of September, I even forgot that I was 20 years old since my birthday was just 8 days before the accident. In the beginning, I just remember thinking that I was having a bad dream of being in a hospital and I just kept thinking, “Why am I dreaming about this? I’ve never been in a hospital.” Even before in the hospital, which I cannot remember, my parents told me I was much like a baby, unable to do really anything. My mother told me she was just hoping I could live to take care of myself someday at least. My mother basically lived with me, in the hospital apartments and in my hospital room, taking care of me, and when I could finally speak, after my trach tube was removed, I would ask what happened. She would just tell me that I was sick. I eventually asked my dad and he told me I was in an accident and I couldn’t believe it, I kept asking him if it was a dream, he said he wished it was. My dad said when I asked him, it came out like a whisper. I found out much later, after I was discharged from inpatient, that one of my vocal cords wasn’t moving and I had so much scar tissue, even down to my windpipe, that gave me swallowing problems, which led to me choking on water every time. When I was first released from the hospital, my family took me to the mall in Atlanta and I had a panic attack, seeing the cars driving by. It was my first time being out in public and I was self-conscious about my tooth, I spoke to people using my hand to cover my mouth. Because of my frontal lobe being damaged, I had no filters and no inhibitions, so I talked and talked about anything to anyone I had met. I talked to strangers on the subway in Atlanta, even ones that did not look approachable in the least. I even told my therapist in outpatient therapy, when I had just met her, about my mother’s hysterectomy and my sister’s self harm (I don’t know why that came up). I was readmitted to the hospital because I had to have surgery on my throat and I stayed another 2 weeks.
I can’t even really begin to write about all of my experiences after the brain injury, there’s so much I would write. I was eventually discharged from the hospital on the 9th of February and I continue to do therapy. I am enrolled at the University of Tennessee in Chattanooga for the fall and I’m even taking a summer class, call it a “test run”. I still have a hoarse voice – still can’t get much volume – and I’m currently in the long process of receiving a tooth implant. It’s hard to do things when you don’t have a car, I’m sad to have lost mine. I had it for less than 2 months. I still don’t feel like I was in an accident or suffered a traumatic brain injury, I can’t fathom it.